Last night I was in a crowded bar, being wingmanned by a woman I had just met (thank you, alcohol).
I was talking to a tall brunette man (that is all I remember about him after a rogue Tequila shot at the bar) and we were laughing and getting along fairly well.
Then he asked me, “So, what do you do for a living?” It’s a question as loathed as, “So, how’s your love life?” when you are not currently employed.
But I stuck my chin out and said, “I’m a journalist.” And, to my surprise, he dropped his smile, said, “Wow, that sounds serious,” and walked away. You’d have thought I’d told him I was a Trump campaigner.
This has got me thinking…Why is journalism such an ‘unattractive’ profession? Yes, it can be ‘serious’ but it’s also creative and fun and requires you to use your brain and analyse the facts. These qualities, in my opinion, are very attractive. It’s the reason my second crush was on Lois Lane (my first, naturally, was on Harry Potter).
So I’ve rounded up some of the top reasons that journalists are v. attractive and worthy of love…
1. Impressive detective skills
Chasing the truth is our passion. So you’ll always be eating in the nicest restaurants on Date Night because we’ll have snooped around beforehand and conducted a few Vox Pops on a random selection of diners. Our top researching skills can also be used altruistically – in other words, we can find out what happened to the boy who bullied you in Year 8.
2. Excellent service in any restaurant/hotel
“I’m a journalist” is the new “I’m a lawyer”. If we receive god-awful service (the roast chicken still has a pulse, for instance) then we can casually mention that we’re journalists. I’ve never tried this myself, although my Mum did mention my profession when she was making a complaint to Butlins one year. Apparently I worked for the Daily Mail and the overcrowded rooms on our holiday were going to be “front-page news”. (What’s more ridiculous is that this worked).
3. Quitting is not in our vocabulary
We won’t give up on you, just as we won’t give up on justice.
4. We appreciate the small things
Writing a 3,000 word feature on the beauty of a wind farm in Norfolk really does make you appreciate the small details in life. Any small gestures from a partner will therefore be gratefully received and could inspire a long-form comment piece.
5. Expert analysis and creative thinking
It may be impossible to surprise us, as we can decode any text message as if we were Benedict Cumberbatch in that film about the Enigma. But our expert analysis also means we come up with weird and wonderful conspiracy theories when watching a documentary or drama. Netflix and Chill will never be the same.
6. We are v. smart wordsmiths
Not only can we probably give you a run for your money on University Challenge, but we are also like human dictionaries. Learn a new word every day by dating a journalist. What does gregarious mean? You’ll have to date us to find out.
7. High levels of stamina
It is a well-known fact that journalists finish their work at the last minute. If we have a deadline for 9am, we will finish the first draft by 2.30am, have a power nap, wake up at 6am and finish it off. This conscientiousness and commitment are both admirable qualities in a partner.
8. Empathetic and good listeners
From interviewing a variety of people during our day-job, we can empathise with what you are going through. Unless, of course, you are still complaining about the Fortnite ban at the dinner table.